In memory of the career of Francis O. Allen

(Las Vegas, NV) Today we mourn the death of the political career of Francis O. Allen, Republican Assemblywoman from Clark County. The career was a tender three years, six months old.

The career made some freshman mistakes in office that riled powerful elements in her GOP base, but those were largely written off to the career being a freshman and developing her own political senses vote-by-vote. In spite of the sudden end chronicled in detail here, the warning signs started long ago. In her first term, the career accepted free tickets to a Rolling Stones concert from a lobbyist. This was technically legal because the gift was offered to all members of the legislature. All but a handful of other legislators' careers figured out on their own that this didn't pass the smell test. This is notable considering that this is not a group generally known for high average I.Q.

The beginning of the end was three months ago with the "Assemblywoman Bridezilla" affair. The career encouraged someone to donate liquor to her wedding in a way that made the gift giver feel the encouragement had pressure behind it. Then, there was the fiasco of stopping payment on the check to cover several thousand dollars in flowers for the event. The wedding was a scandal two-for-one.

With the recent union of the career's husband's forearm and a steak knife, the end to the career came in a moment. Reinforcing the end of the career was the old trick of "tell the cops he stabbed himself and is blaming me" story. The movie Fight Club could be introduced as evidence of concept.

The career is survived by the careers of Asy. Minority Leader Heidi Gansert and her 13 remaining caucus members. She will be missed by friends, colleagues, and those of us who never tire of telling our editors that we live in a state where this kind of thing really does happen.